On May 20, 2006, J and I made our way to the Pageant, a medium-sized venue in University City. It's large enough for popular bands to play while still maintaining a certain sense of intimacy with the audience. Saturday night, HIM headlined with support act, Aiden.
At the Pageant, if you're 21 you can gain access to the attached Halo Bar. This is a bar that allows you to get your pre-show drink on then gain early access. This is what we did. By 5:30 we had made our way down to the Pageant and hurried past the Hot Topic contingent that had been waiting in line all day. We sat down, ordered ourselves a drink and mentally prepared for the night ahead. For sure, it was going to be slightly different from other concert nights as one week prior I had won two tickets to a meet and greet after the show.
Back at the Halo Bar, J people-watched and I, next to her, was somewhere else entirely in my head. As I drank my second whiskey sour and smoked my umpteenth cigarette, I organized and finalized my questions. I was going to ask Linde about the Daniel Lioneye project and beg that they come to St. Louis if they take it on the road. I would ask Ville about the significance of the Finnish folk song "Paratiisi", which he sang with the Agents a lifetime of his ago. I would say "I've read that you superstitiously start your shows 8 minutes after the hour, could you expand on that?" Of course, when it came down to it, whether or not I could form any coherent sentences at all would have to be seen.
We had grand plans to be in the pit that night, as I had a strange desire to see Ville's pores. Briefly, while in the pit J and I met a superfan named Dan who was a very open and friendly chap. He and I chatted about our favorite HIM songs for a bit. Ultimately, as the crowd got much larger around us, we decided to ditch the pit and said goodbye to Dan. It was a good move to settle in our seats up in the balcony. While there is no crowd surfing at this venue, the opening act Aiden, My Chemical Romance wannabes (do not get me started), encouraged moshing and general rowdiness. In fact, one of the guitarists actually stage dived (dove?) into the crowd directly left of center, which is where we had originally stood. We sat cynically and impatiently through Aiden's set and waited for the music that can make my heart drip with innocent love and then in an instant throw me into the quagmire of deviant desires. I came tonight to hear what love and lust sound like live.
When Aiden finally ended their set, the stage crew prepared the stage for the night's headliners, complete with candlabras (how goth). What sounded like Scandinavian ambient music filled the smoky air. It was going to be a night unlike any other concert night.
The music ended and the lights went down at exactly 9:08 PM. As soon as the iconic heartagram lit up in the background, the collective sonic screams could have reached heaven itself. As Ville Valo slinked to the microphone with trademark cigarette in hand, it was not just any lead singer we were observing- this was someone who would, for the next hour and a half, command the swooning audience with the slightest nod of his head. He was suave, laid-back, and often courteous to the audience, bowing and clapping with approval as we sang the songs back to him at his invitation. Excluding the occasional oral introduction to this song or that song and the periodic sight of bras being tossed onto the stage, this paragraph could sum up the entire performance. But it won't.
Setlist (not necessarily in this order)
Soul On Fire
Vampire Heart
The Funeral of Hearts
It's All Tears
The Sacrament (encore)
Play Dead
Killing Loneliness
Wings of a Butterfly
Join Me In Death
Behind the Crimson Door
Wicked Game
Right Here In My Arms
Razorblade Kiss
Your Sweet 666
Each song was a highlight. At no time was there a lull in the performance and the audience sang every memorized word of every anthemic song. And I do mean every song. The heavy "Soul On Fire" (Love Metal) opened the show. With lyrics like: "We are like the living dead/ Craving for deliverence/With a frozen heart and a soul on fire", it is no wonder that much of the audience there was dressed in gothic regalia. The next song was "Vampire Heart" (Dark Light). This one is quite possibly my favorite of all HIM songs. "Right Here In My Arms" (RR), a fantastic rock-out tune, brought everyone to a clapping frenzy. With "Join Me In Death" (RR) and "The Funeral of Hearts", Ville demonstrated his falsetto with the grace and passionate plea of his miserably romantic poet persona. "It's All Tears" (Greatest Lovesongs, Vol. 666) was HIM again exercising its metal roots. Ville's jump from baritone to tenor was well exercised in "Behind The Crimson Door" (DL), but was never more excellently displayed then with "It's All Tears'" simple but effective chorus "I'm waiting for you to drown in my love/ So open your arms". Because this is America, because the latest album Dark Light is the first HIM album to be released here and overseas simultaneously, and because HIM now has these videos playing on MTV2, songs like "Killing Loneliness" and "Wings of A Butterfly" were the most loudly sung by the audience, but didn't stand out as much as the others. HIM's cover of "Wicked Game" (GL666), both live and recorded, makes one ask "Chris who?". Finally, the encore was, appropriately, "The Sacrament" (LM). The song is like a beautiful unholy hymn. It was a perfect, albeit abrupt conclusion to the pseudo-religious experience shared by hundreds.
Because I studied every movement, I thought I would mention that Ville constantly (1) spit on the stage (2) shrugged and rolled his shoulders back as if to relieve tension. We all know how thin he is, but it's something different to behold live. He also wore black slacks, a black blazer, and a Black Sabbath t-shirt. Oh, and the black beanie, god bless him. He was incredibly "covered". He's not a very energetic soul on stage, but he did seem much more stationary than usual. If I heard him correctly, although any speaking he did was so low and warbled I couldn't make out much, he did mention the word "sick". Damn. I knew where this was going.
What was missing was anything from Deep Shadows and Brilliant Highlights. For me, I consider "Lose You Tonight", "Heartache Every Moment", "In Joy and Sorrow" and "Pretending" to be outstanding HIM songs. Any one of those songs could have fit into the setlist. I would have loved to hear "Sweet Pandemonium" and "This Fortress of Tears" from Love Metal. And of course, "Sigillum Diaboli", a fantastic rock song from Razorblade Romance, was missed. Selfishly, I would have loved to hear Ville perform a non-accompanied version of "Paratiisi", but maybe he'll grant me a private concert someday.
To our disappointment, the Warner Bros representative announced that because the band was very tired and very sick, that there would be no meet and greet after the show.
While the radio station rep and the WB rep struggled to find an alternative to this disappointment, I sat down and lit up a cigarette and absorbed the moment. While watching the crew tear down HIM's set, I came to the conclusion that this was one of those life lessons where you are forced to accept certain truths. What I had been looking foward to was not going to happen, but god damnit if I didn't enjoy the concert more than anything in a long while. Regardless, it was disappointing, but I didn't feel personally slighted. What would have been worse is the band being forced to see people when they clearly weren't in the shape to do so. That is always a tricky situation- that's where you find yourself in an awkward moment subject to the artists' moods. No thank you.
We ended up with two signed Dark Light promos and exclusive t-shirts.
So as I write this, I still struggle a little bit with my feelings, but despite the disappointment, I am listening to my HIM concert playlist, enjoying a cold sweet tea, and smoking my tasty Marlboro Lights (while wearing my Jagermeister HIM t-shirt, I might add). I come out of this having enjoyed the concert immensely. I also feel somewhat thankful for the rotten post-show experience. Why? Because with the money that J and I will make from auctioning J's signed Dark Light poster, HIM will have unknowingly purchased our next concert tickets (though mine is framed and proudly displayed on my wall, thank you very much). Kiitos, boys! -K
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