Umbrella Academy Gets Ready to Hit Big Screen

Thank you J for sending this link to me from NME online. Apprently, Gerard Way's comic Umbrella Academy is getting prepped for a screen adaptation! -K

Astro Zombies

I've been on a musical sabbatical lately and I'm sorry for letting J down to carry this blog on her own. Sometimes I go through this dark age with my music where I get sick of everything and have to cleanse myself of all the noise. I've also been out of pocket for another reason, but I'll reveal that soon enough... ANYWAY, today I've been thinking about My Chemical Romance a lot and reminiscing of the times when I braved the heat of St. Louis just to see these newly famous kids from Jersey play to thousands at Warped. I've also been thinking back to when I would feel less than stellar I could put in Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge and feel incredibly empowered. That's what I'm needing now and that's why I'm thinking about MCR. HIM may be home, but MCR makes me feel alive again.

Back in 2005 I got a copy of MCR's cover of the Misfits' Astro Zombies and loved it. I'm not sure how I lost it on my iPod, but I think it had something to do with a crashed laptop and a lost iTunes library that had to be rebuilt. There was a also a wonderful version of All I Want for Christmas is You from MCR, but that was lost as well. Anyway, I just found it again on iTunes and I'm so happy! Here's a youtube clip of this short but sweet, punk rock song recorded back when MCR were still a hungry band wanting to change the world. -K

My Chemical Romance - The Pageant - St Louis 5/3/2008

"You people have no idea how hard it is to stand up here in front of all of you with a zipper that won’t stay up." Not exactly what you expect to hear during a rock show from Gerard Way, lead singer of rock darlings My Chemical Romance. Here's a kid from Jersey who didn’t make it as an artist so decides to start a band (yes, MCR was a plan B, if you can believe it) subsequently and after a lot of hard touring becomes the lead singer of one of the most successful rock bands around. They've gained respect from peers, gotten kudos as well as career advice from Dave Grohl (maybe not so much eyeliner) and are admired by kids, tweens, teenagers and adults. Not everyone has the chutzpah to do this. Not everyone has the ability to make grown frat boys take off their shirt and twirl them around on command or do jazz hands like he did at Warped in ’05, back when they weren’t even THAT successful yet. Not everyone can order a swelling audience of hundreds in a Chicago summer day move back from the stage en masse on the count of three. I have seen Gerard do those very things. Read further and I’ll explain why I think besides making amazing music, they are so loved by so many different kinds of people.
Saturday night, I’m at The Pageant watching MCR at one of their last Black Parade performances. I’m standing in the photo pit watching the rock stars that J and I have kind of watched grow up (yeah, I feel like we did), explode onto the stage KILLING it. The lead singer with the cheek bones off which everything hangs, strikes a triumphant pose right above me. I’m in heaven. I cannot believe this shy nail-biter J and I met at the Oasis show in 2005 is emanating such power to his sold out audience and I’m able to see it all close-up. I’ve photographed a HIM show or two and now there’s a lead singer who has his audience eating out of his hand, but Gerard Way...there’s no comparison to his energetic charisma. I've seen these guys several times and every time is like the first. He’s working the audience, he’s looking at everyone’s eyes, he’s shaking his hips, he’s screaming at the top of his lungs...then, I see him look down in horror to find that his fly is down. Right in front of a sold out Pageant. He turns around quickly, fixes the wardrobe malfunction, laughs embarrassingly at Ray Toro and then keeps going without missing a beat. Throughout the night, that zipper was going to keep going as well. Down, that is. These moments are what my former coworker A would have called “Bridget Jones moments.” Quite true. In an instant, Gerard Way, without even trying, found himself breaking down the barrier between rock star artifice and the common man who must suffer embarrassing experiences. Without trying, Gerard and his band not only tell you they know what it’s like to not always be a winner, but occasionally show you. It’s an extremely endearing quality that characterizes the quintet from New Jersey (can't forget Chicagoan drummer, Bob Bryar). To me, while the music hits you like a bullet (through a flock of doves- yes I went there), what makes them so attractive to people is the fact that they deliver a show with an unassuming, genuine love of the artform. They're performing onstage to connect with you (and yes, to save your life- though I'm so sick of hearing that). Every person in that venue, a 30-something corporate chick, a mom, a dad, a jock, or just some drunk midwesterner, felt connected to that band that night. As long as I've followed these guys, they've genuinely connected to a lot of people, be it through music, through interviews, or excellent showmanship. Not everyone's into the black-clad look, but for whatever reason will find something evocative in the music or the performance. MCR work it, and they work it well.
Despite the embarrassing wardrobe malfunction, Gerard made light of it and the band continued on to complete a 2+ hour set that included b-sides and crowd favorites with as much energy as when they were still hungry- which was not that long ago. St. Louisans are always a great audience and they gave it right back.


















Set list:
This is How I Disappear
Dead!
Cemetery Drive
Give ‘Em Hell, Kid
My Way Home is Through You (B-side Famous Last Words)
The Black Parade
I Don’t Love You
House of Wolves
Never Told You What I Do For a Living
Heaven (B-side Welcome to the Black Parade)
Mama
You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Prison
Headfirst for Halos
Kill All Your Friends (B-side FLW)
I’m Not Okay
Teenagers
Famous Last Words
Cancer
__________
Desert Song (from Life on the Murder Scene)
Desolation Row (Bob Dylan cover)
Helena


Illustrating my point of their relatability to many, the audience consisted of a potpourri of onlookers. In the pit were teenagers, whose worried mothers and fathers peppered the outskirts of the area looking for signs of their kids. Very soon I saw a lot of parent-looking people waving their arms and yelling the songs out as well... I saw a female fan who had painted X’s on her eyes like Frank Iero used to do a few years ago. There was a regular schmo who practically sang every line of Cancer in my ear. Behind us were two men, one 6’4” guy who wore a Chicago Cubs baseball cap and another shorter version of his kind who sported a permanent beer and a cigarette- both looked as though they had rolled out of a baseball game and happened to find themselves inside a Tim Burton musical. For some reason, it reminded me of a story J told me about her husband H and his army buddies- how one night they had a pass to go to the movies and paid money to see A Nightmare Before Christmas not realizing what it was. Soon I realized they knew exactly where they were. One of them sang every word from every Black Parade song and the other sang every word to Helena TO his friend, who had closed his eyes and disappeared into his repressed imagination.
This last leg of tour will precede a two year break, apparently, which is disappointing, but I think we all get it. Gerard introduced Helena with a request that we all do something creative we love- start a band, write something, or draw, etc. Sweetheart, you’ll never know how much of an inspiration you were to J and me 3 years ago... UNBELIEVABLE-K

Finally!

I finally have some shows to look forward to. This month my gentleman friend and I will be going to see Jackson Browne perform an acoustic set. Then I have Bon Jovi at the end of April, and then My Chemical Romance at Sloss Furnace in Birmingham and in St. Louis where my friends and fellow HIM fans L and C will be joining me at The Pageant. Thank you Jesus. We have overcome. -K

Here We Go 'A Waffling. Wait... That Can't Be Right.

You know, only in America would you find a guy who decides to protest the loss of spirituality in Christmas by crucifying a Santa Claus on his front lawn. My god, what are we doing that we don't think up shit like that, J?

Anyway, we're having a brown Christmas here in the south due to the drought. It's becoming an "oh shit" period of time down here, but we'll survive. I thought I would post a little something before I head over to my parents and open up presents. My mom's German customs have always become standard in the house, so we open presents on Christmas Eve, the stockings are for show only, we and just spend Christmas Day watching movies, crackling tree fir, and eating ham. Our pagan-like customs promise to be no different this year, weather notwithstanding.

Rather than doing a hitlist with some of my favorite songs, I thought I would discuss some Christmasy things I've been thinking about today.

Firstly, a few years ago My Chemical Romance did an adorable cover of All I Want for Christmas is You. You can find it here.

Nikki Sixx's new band Sixx:A.M. has a song called Xmas in Hell. Check out this stanza:

I've started a new diary and this time I have a few new reasons.
One, I have no friends left.
Two, so I can read back and remember what I did the day before.
And three, so if I die, at least I leave a nice little suicide note of my life.

My friend C sent me this video because a long time ago one of the first things we ever talked about was the strange union of these two. We then jumped into a rendition of it, complete with the "peace on earth…" bit. We still think we're hilarious.



There was an article I was reading that referenced the history of wassailing. This just cracks me up.

"In the 17th century, Puritans, who had long seen the holiday as a Catholic manifestation, concluded that attempts to tame or "Christianize" Christmas had failed. They managed to get Christmas banned for several years in England and Massachusetts, which was then an English colony.
The holiday returned in the 1660s, picking up a tradition of "wassailing," which in New England involved drunken bands of men banging on the doors of the rich, demanding entry and singing songs in return for food and alcohol.
"It was a rough version of caroling," Nissenbaum says. "It made for a lot of tense interaction."

That's all I had for now. Happy Holidays, y'all! -K

Dead!

No, these aren't concert tickets. As my MCR ticket sat unused at the box office of the O2 Arena, I was on a train heading north for work. The closest thing I got to MCR tonight was listening to them on my iPod as I tried to drown out the screaming baby sitting in front of me. --J

The Look

By chance, they released some additional tickets for MCR’s last UK date of The Black Parade tour. I went to buy one for the show on the 15th in London and found that you cannot purchase tickets and have them waiting for you at the “will call” window nor can you have them mailed anywhere but your billing address, which at the moment is in the U.S. Rather than risk having the ticket sent to the States and then have H mail it to me in time for the show, I thought I needed to find someone to buy me the ticket as I gave them the cash. So who would I ask? I know my boss the best, so I said to her that while I knew this went beyond her supervisory duties, would she be willing to buy this ticket for me and she agreed. I headed to her office, money in hand and we went through the transaction. I got the look twice:

1. Because I was going to go to this show by myself.
2. Because at my age I was going to see a band called My Chemical Romance.

She said, “You like going to these things?” I laughed and said, “I just need to go see some screaming Americans next week”. I don’t know why I felt so guilty. It’s not as if she walked into the room and I had a needle hanging from my arm. A woman I work with proudly announced last week that she was flying to Rotterdam to see Take That in concert for cryin out loud! I mean she is TRAVELLING to see them. Oh well, when I have ticket in hand, I won’t care what others think. --J

Sweet Home Alabama...Over and Over

It's my first days back in Huntsville and I'm already noticing the stark difference between St. Louis radio stations and the ones here. Earlier, I touched scan in my car and hit on four stations that mentioned Jesus, three that played Faith Hill nonstop (which is not terrible because I happen to love Faith, but come on), one pop radio station that actually plays MCR's "Teenagers" (bonus), but censored the curse words (are you kidding?), and one classic rock station that has played the same set of songs since I moved to Huntsville the first time in 1993. I'll adjust soon, but it will take a while. I didn't like St. Louis in general, but I will miss the radio. -K

Projekt Revolution, Pt. 2, Tinley Park, IL

When we got to Tinley Park it was sunny and hotter. The main stage was not yet open, but that gave us a chance to hear and watch some of the bands at the Revolution stage. We sat on a grassy knoll that was inhabited by all the other adults looking for any patch of shade next to the stage.





Once the main stage opened up we looked for our seats and then walked up the hill to watch Julien-K perform. The lead singer was at a wedding, so Chester Bennington performed in his place. We got some sun while waiting for 6:00 to hit. Once it did, we headed down to our seats to catch HIM's performance for the second time in 24 hours.

The setlist was the same, so I could sit back, enjoy the show and take a hundred pictures.



I kept thinking to myself, "why am I so obsessed with taking a thousand pictures of this band?" Seriously, you take one, you've taken them all. I guess I was feeling kind of "ME! This is MY moment! I'm going to take a hundred pictures that I won't be able to distinguish later when I download them and post them online!" These photos are so slightly distinguishable from each other, that if I were to be able to flip through them quickly it would be like watching the silent film version of a HIM show.

Here are a handful of those pictures.

Ville looking to his right and smiling- bless him

Ville adjusting the microphone stand

Ville's still not happy with the stand

Ville shifting to the right

Ville smoking and singing

Ville putting a little oomph into it

Ville taking a sip of water

At some point I looked around and saw that I was the only one mouthing the words. Who gives a shit. This was a moment, damn it!

Random Tinley happenings:
I feel as though I saw Madina Lake's Matthew Leone everywhere at Tinley. He drove by us driving a golf cart, walking around saying hello, and may have served me my $6.00 lemonade for all I know.

Speaking of which, C and I were so admiring our lemonade at one point that we did not notice two members of Linkin Park walking next to us. It wasn't until people screamed towards us that we figured out what just happened. Good thing we were alert, eh?

We watched Placebo walk to the stage in between civilians and though they smiled and were congenial, none of the teenage girls noticed at all, poor boys. C and I should have screamed their names just for the helluvit.

Saosin's Justin Shekowski walking around wearing a conical Vietnamese hat.

The acrobatic bassist from Mindless Self Indulgence stood about ten feet away from us. Jimmy Urine from the same band was quickly surrounded by fans at Tinley. I caught some of their set and was impressed with their swagger on stage. The music had a lot of these 80s video game bleeps.

The jumbotrons displayed text messages from concertgoers. Messages like "Cardinals!" would result in boos, "Cubs!" would results in screams. Then there were messages that read "Bam is in the house!" and "Marry me Bam." C and I figured Bam was indeed in the house after the fifth tm came up on the screen. Very cool.

I saw Gerard Way on his cell phone walking by the buses cutting quite the figure in his usual black attire.

The MCR performance was even better up close. The setlist didn't change at Tinley, so I'll just add some of the pics I took. (edit: I need to apologize because I stupidly resized these pics before linking them. I'll upload them in their normal size soon.)
Chicagoan Bob Bryar on a rotating drumkit

Explosive

Bombastic

Gerard in the center, striking a classic pose

More of the show

More shirtless boys… This guy looks like he is not sure if what he's doing could be considered gay.

One of the highlights was in the end of "Mama" when the music turns to a waltz beat. C and I grabbed onto each other and swayed back and forth singing our hearts out. When "Cancer" ended and the lights dimmed, I looked over at C who was wiping tears from her eyes. The trip was coming to a close and we both just stood staring at the stage wishing for more.

We stayed the night with a mutual friend of J's and mine, M. She had wine and food waiting for us and we were able to wind down in the quiet and the comfort of the Chicago suburbs. M was wonderful to see again and she and C got along like old friends. When we collapsed into sleep, I felt extremely lucky that the weekend had gone by with no issue. We hadn't been late, my car wasn't broken into (like it has happened before at a Go-Go's concert in Atlanta), and C and I had our very first road trip under our belts. Though I had no personal encounters with my beautiful creatures, I had least didn't have the inevitable fear that I had made an ass of myself.

When we left, C said to me that she wanted to keep going to concerts with me. I had been worried the whole time that as type-a as I was when it came to this trip that she would be more stressed out and/or bored rather than happy to be there with me. I guess I shouldn't have worried. That night she IM'ed me and wanted me to download the HIM and MCR songs setlists. She's even going to get us tickets to the St. Louis HIM show in October. Hey, maybe it will be cancelled, but at least for now it's something to look forward to. UNBELIEVABLE UNBELIEVABLE UNBELIEVABLE-K

Projekt Revolution, Pt. 1, Noblesville, IN

As C and I hurried to collect some coins for the 294 toll booths headed out of Chicago yesterday, I could tell that something was welling up inside. It was a kind of hopelessness you feel when you suddenly hate what you are rocketing towards: life, reality, home. All I could think about was the cavernous apartment I call home that is surely infested with ants once again, the fact that I am a few weeks from moving and I haven't saved enough, and that J should have been with us on this trip. It wasn't so much the fact that my life truly sucks. It doesn't. What I was suffering from was the inevitable crash from the euphoria of the last 36 hours. It was an incredible weekend. So let me tell you about my weekend at Projekt Revolution.

Last Friday morning I picked up C and we headed towards Indianapolis. I felt the need to prepare C for the weekend. I explained that "I will probably do a lot of scouting" and "if by sheer luck I happened to be standing in front of Gerard Way or Ville Valo I may need you to take over the camera". Being uninvested in these two creatures, she should feel free to request that Ville stand closer to me or whatever, blah blah. Ever the trouper, she assured me that this would not be a problem. I tried not to bore her, but I couldn't help telling her about the first time J and I took a road trip together, how Gerard Way sat a few feet away from us, and how on the Red Bull-fueled overnight drive back to St. Louis we were sandwiched in between the convoy of buses taking a plethora of bands to the St. Louis Warped. Of course, this convoy included MCR's bus, so it was pretty much "life changing." I mentioned that I had no idea what MCR's set would be like, that it would more than likely be bigger than anything I had seen them do, and that seeing HIM again, well, they were basically the main reason I had purchased these tickets. I went on to describe how I seemed to have terrible luck when it came to HIM (cue more stories including a cancelled meet and greet, cancelled tour, etc.), but that I was looking forward to see a recently rehabbed Ville. As soon as I finished blabbering my phone rang. It was J calling from London. My heart pounding from excitement to hear her voice (it was the first time since she left), I listened as she seemed to fight back tears declaring that she so wished to be on this trip. It was not the first time J would be present that weekend. Not in person, of course, but in spirit.

We sailed into the venue with no issue. When we arrived around 4:30 PM, the Revolution stage had already finished with its up and coming bands like Madina Lake and Mindless Self Indulgence. The temperature outside was in the 80s and sunny. Perfect. I grabbed C's hand and rushed her to the lawn as smoke began pouring out from the side of the main stage. We grabbed a program and saw that HIM was scheduled to perform at 6:00 and MCR was on at 8:00, so we had time to wade through the crowd and find the optimal spot on the lawn. Julien-K was just beginning their set and so we decided to get up and scope up the grounds.

We stood on a small hill with a few other HIM fans that overlooked the buses hoping to catch a glimpse of our boys walking around off the clock. Why is that so fascinating? Seeing a various amount of security guards, roadies, and lucky fans being herded into the area to meet one of the bands, we decided to head back to the lawn. It was time for Placebo after all, and I'd never seen them before. The lawn was an interesting place. Besides the ever present scent of pot, which we endured throughout the evening since we sat next to a group of very brave kids who smoked continuously, there were a lot of drunks. Uch, even though it was not as hot as it had been for the last week, I felt sick at the idea of being drunk while being baked in the sun. A fight broke out by us, we saw an amazing amount of ass crack and passed out drunks were awoken and kindly escorted out.

The only song from Placebo I recognized was their opening song "Without You I'm Nothing". Placebo put on an energetic show, but it was obvious that they were not performing to their audience. They seemed to come and go with not much notice. I was shocked at how efficiently and quickly one band's set was broken down and the next band's erected. Perhaps showing our age, C and I often noted this and nodded in approval.

The well-known heartagram symbol appeared onstage and the crowd screamed. The letters H I M were written over the symbol which for some reason cracked me up. I guess since HIM is not that well known over here the usual lone symbol wasn't enough for people to know who they were. I kept thinking "this must be their away backdrop" (you know, like team uniforms).



We couldn't see shit from the lawn, but the jumbotrons helped, which is why my collection of photos from Indi are mostly of jumbotrons. They will make good wallpapers, I will say that.



Around us people were making out and C got her first taste of the effect this band's music has on some people. As an old friend once said "HIM is sex." Before beginning the last song "Kiss of Dawn", Ville thanked the street team for working so hard to spread the word and introduced the mother of his friend who committed suicide last year, about whom he wrote the song.



There's not much to say about the live show because they are always so inanimate onstage. Nothing outrageous happens, they just play their music. This they did extremely well. Ville hit every note and sounded great. After that set, I, along with a lot of people around me, lit up a cigarette to bask in the afterglow.

Setlist:
Passions Killing Floor (new)
Wings of a Butterfly
Your Sweet 666
Vampire Heart
Dead Lovers Lane (new)
Killing Loneliness
Drown in This Love (leading into a short dedication to The Stooges' TV-Eye)
Wicked Game
Kiss of Dawn (new)

The band left the stage and in two snaps the stage was ready for Taking Back Sunday. This performance was a little underwhelming. The band put a lot of energy into the set, but the audience around us seemed kind of indifferent like us.

Next was MCR. By the sonic screams that you heard when the black and white backdrop came up you would have thought that the band was already performing. When the lights went down and the band did come out, C and I took notice. No one was sitting by the time Gerard marched onstage with a look on his face that told you were about to be blown away whether you liked it or not. The band opened with "How I Disappear" and as soon as the guitars exploded C was hooked. I saw a potential conversion in the making with her movements and smiles. It's not often that you walk into a show and come out a fan, but that's what happened with her. She commented on how the band seemed to put everything they had into the performance. "That's MCR", I said sentimentally. But I'm getting ahead of myself...



I've always liked how Gerard yells at you to "get the fuck up" and before you even have time to react you're doing it.



We are far from the days of the minimal sets from Warped and the first headlining tour of 2005. Accompanying the set were pyrotechnics, a rotating drum kit, and fireworks.

This looks so much better in its normal size, I swear.

Gerard donned a feather boa for "You Know What They Do to Guys Like Us in Prison", before which he told the men in the audience to take off their shirts and swing them in the air for the song's duration. Wouldn't you know it, the guys did it



Gerard has gotten a bit more risqué. At one point he simulated masturbation on stage and put his hand down the front of his pants. C and I were pleased by this, hahaha. Gerard ended the set with a solo performance of "Cancer." This was a surprise because after such an energetic set I didn't expect such a sad song, but it worked. He sounded great as well. When they left the stage C and I couldn't stop smiling. As J said, I came for HIM, but in the end it was MCR that satisfied me.



Setlist:
How I Disappear
The Sharpest Lives
I'm Not Okay
Famous Last Words
House of Wolves
Give 'Em Hell, Kid!
Dead
Mama
Welcome to the Black Parade
You Know What They Do To Guys like Us in Prison
Teenagers
Helena
Cancer

We took off before Linkin Park came on and headed to our hotel in Indianapolis. We reflected on the day's events and drifted off, mentally preparing to do the same thing in Chicago the next day... -K

It's the Eve of My Last Midwest Concert Road Trip...

I received a little package at work from the J in the UK today. In it were two issues of Kerrang! and one issue of Rock Sound. It couldn't come at a better time. Tomorrow I head out on the road for one last time before moving down south and for obvious reasons have been thinking about J a lot. My friend C and I will be heading to the Indianapolis Projekt Revolution show going on tomorrow night, then heading to Chicago to catch it there on Saturday. HIM and MCR together, two nights in a row. I may not be the same after this trip. I don't think C understands what she has signed up for! -K

Love you and miss you sweety.

What the hell?

What the hell, MCR! No St. Louis date on the Black Parade tour? -K

The Black Parade - J's Take

I’ve given The Black Parade more than a few listens and while I like the album, there aren’t any songs that really jump out at me like some of the songs on Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge. What I guess I would say about the new album is that if you are already a fan, you’ll like it, but I don’t imagine there will be a rush of converts. The one song I would remove from the album is Cancer. I agree with whoever in the band felt it was too literal. I am also kind of puzzled by the “album of the year” comments from some critics. Why is this album being taken so seriously when Three Cheers was not? On the way to a show this weekend, K and I were listening for Queen’s A Night at the Opera, a noted influence of The Black Parade. Listening to that album from start to finish, I really would say that My Chemical Romance is the closest modern day band carrying the torch for Queen. That’s a good thing. –J

MCR's The Black Parade

I’m just going to put this quote out there. No need to discuss it: “…something that we had always wanted but were always missing…it helped us complete the sound we wanted to create.” Wait. Gerard, what are you talking about? Oh, the addition of keyboards on the new album, The Black Parade (Reprise). Excellent!

(J, I’m sorry that I won’t let your emphatic distaste of keyboards in hard rock ever die)

My Chemical Romance released their third album last week. I approached the release of this album very seriously. I purposely tried to stay away from reading any early reviews. This third album is something I have anticipated more than anything this year and it was important to me to not be clouded by other journalists’ opinions. If I listened to anyone it was the band itself who gave us fans a mock press conference in late August/ early September. That was all the information I needed.

As October 24th approached, I would occasionally worry myself about a couple of things. Firstly, I was worried that there would be too much of that Cabaret thing happening. I’m German. I love it. But bands like The Dresden Dolls and Panic! make me want to drown myself in guitar noodling and legends of groupies. My second concern was that this album would be too heavily conceptual for my taste. Not conceptual as in Woody Guthrie’s Dust Bowl Ballads where the collection of songs have a similar theme, but conceptual in that the artist is trying to tell you a story. When artists do this, there’s always a possibility that there could be a handful of good songs and then a handful of shitty songs that were meant to carry the story along. Who wants that?

MCR is no stranger to a concept album. Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge was loosely conceptual and considered the continuation of the last song on the band’s first album, I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love. It had a story, but it could be summed up in one word: Revenge. That’s all that you had to remember when you listened to it. The Black Parade was not to be ‘loosely’ based on a story. Quite the opposite.

What I’m happy to report is that this cd is an excellent rock album, first and foremost. There is certainly a macabre cabaret thing going on and it is conceptual, but you know what, I fucking love it. So, my anxieties aside, let me tell you about my new favorite album, The Black Parade.

The motivation behind this album was the question “what if, when death comes for you, it somehow taps into your subconscious and transforms itself into your strongest, most cherished memory?” On this album you have the main protagonist, The Patient, who dies from cancer. His strongest memory is of a parade his father took him to when he was a child. So, death comes to The Patient in the form of a parade. He follows the parade to his ultimate fate, whatever afterlife there is. Along the way he meets a few characters, i.e., the twins Fear and Regret. It’s simple, relatable (in the ‘everything comes down to dying with me’ kind of way) beautiful, and so very MCR.

Like I said, this is a rock album, so let’s talk about the guitars. There are two guitarists in the band, Ray Toro and Frank Iero. Ray comes from the classic rock guitar side of the house while Frank comes from the punk power chord side of the house. The two mixed together create wonderfully energetic and fast-moving melodies. These two guys have been with the band since the beginning and I think without either one of them MCR would be incomplete. Besides Gerard’s performance, which is in itself something to behold live, it’s the marriage of these two guitar styles that make their music so kickass, in my opinion.

Another kickass element is the message of empowerment in each of their songs. I will tell you that no matter what age you are, you can’t help but be moved by the insistence that you will shine your brightest when you face your greatest fears and disappointments. This is what I loved on Three Cheers, and it’s abundant on the new album.

Let’s talk about the tracklisting. I’ll just discuss the ones that I love the most. Wait. That just happens to be all of them.

1. The End. This is a powerful opening to the album. The Patient welcomes you.

2. Dead! I love the flat line in the beginning. As I was reading the lyrics to this song I came across the lyric “During this operation Found a complication in your heart So long”. This has to be a reference to the operation during which Gerard’s grandma passed away due to complications. This event inspired the song Helena on Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge, but we already know that.

3. This is How I Disappear. Towards the end of the Revenge tour Gerard developed a fascination with Houdini and the séances his wife would hold after he died. Some of the last pics that were published overseas towards the end of the tour were of the band hanging upside down in straight jackets. Gerard tells you in the liner notes that The Escape Artist is one of the characters the Patient meets on his journey.

4. The Sharpest Lives. There is a Bon Jovi element to this one which I’m really into!

5. Welcome to the Black Parade. I agree with J that the opening of this song could be cut short a little bit. However, once the song starts moving it’s awesome.

6. I Don’t Love You. I repeated this song four times when I first heard it. I love Ray’s guitar solo in this one.

7. House of Wolves. I think of Detroit twice. Can you guess why? I LOVE the power chords. Mikey’s bass playing comes through in this song. I’m looking forward to seeing the crowd go apeshit when this song is performed live.

8. Cancer is a song that Ray Toro felt was going to be too honest or literal for people to take (from the liner notes in the limited edition of the cd). This is a beautiful 2-minute ballad. If you have been touched by this disease, as J and I both have been, you will not hear this song easily, but do it. This is fucked up, but I listened to this song while I was putting on my face in preparation to go out. I cried so hard I had to wash my face and start over.

9. Mama. Gerard definitely has a fascination for the Macabre Cabaret of the German persuasion. Gerard sings in different voices in this song. LIZAAAAAAAAAAAAA with a Z makes an appearance on this song. Brilliant.

10. Sleep. Wonderfully ambient in some parts and hard in others. Very nice.

11. Teenagers. This is a very different sound for them. I live for Gerard yelling “AWDAGETHA NOW!!” towards the end. Hilarious.

12. Disenchanted. It took me just a few seconds to realize what I was hearing. When they performed a “new” song called Shut Up and Play during their show at the Pageant in September 2005, I remember thinking “Air Supply”. I liked it, but it was quite a departure. Shortly after that performance, a fellow fan in the UK sent me a shared file of that song performed live overseas. Shut Up and Play was in my larger than life MCR playlist for a long time until one fateful day my laptop crashed and I hadn’t backed up in time (won’t do that again). Anyway, now I have it again but in its finished form and with its new title, Disenchanted. AND it doesn’t sound so Air Supply anymore.

13. Famous Last Words. There’s just a hint of noodling in this song! Great song to end the album with. This song is considered the sister song of Sleep.

There is a track 14, but it’s hidden. Let the cd player play on in its silence for about 1m 30s and you’ll hear an interesting cabaret song that showcases Gerard and his dark humor. Quite the little gem.

For the fans that can afford it, get the special limited edition for the photography and sketches, the commentary, and the written diary.

It’s no secret how much I love this band. The Judakris picture on this website is a sketch of us at the Oasis show in 2005 during which I met Gerard for the first time. K is the one on the right of picture, distracted by the lovely man in black sitting down to her left during most of the show. It was a completely serendipitous and lovely experience that I wrote about in an earlier post entitled “In the Beginning, There Was Oasis…” In that post I also write about the drive back to St. Louis, during which a line of tour buses carrying MCR and a bunch of other bands to our hometown Warped show stayed alongside us much of the way. The memory of that night is one that I will never forget. If, according to this album, death taps into your subconscious and transforms itself into one of your strongest and/or cherished memories then when I’ve reached my end of days, I’ll wait for the line of tour buses to guide me down the highway to see an MCR show for one last time. Well done, boys. I give this one an Unbelievable. XOXO -K

Chicago Vol. 3 Playlist

Since the last “reorganization” within our company, work has become a little angsty for me. Everyone would rather be doing something besides work, right? Well, I never actually saw my job as being a shitty one. So, it has been particularly disappointing to face the bad taste in my mouth and find the motivation just to get out of bed every morning. I admit it, I’m stressed. You can probably tell how stressed I’ve been based on my Foo Fighters review. I know, boo-hoo. Whatever. It happens and it won’t be there forever, so for now I’m just getting by with getting by. My ways of decompression were and are a little schizophrenic, because on some nights I work out intensely or I just drink a healthy amount of Jaegermeister and smoke. Both do the trick for me, but on the latter nights I inevitably fire up the laptop, get onto iTunes, and test drive or purchase the latest pop songs that iTunes tells me everyone else is listening to.

J and I are into playlists for our road trips. Since we were going to an acoustic show, we both prepared playlists that had mellower themes. While mine was mellower than usual, it was also poppier. Shockingly so, in fact. Not only was it poppier, it also raised some eyebrows. I knew what I was doing, but some of the songs on the playlist show how outside of myself I have been in the last few weeks. I can justify it by saying that sometimes I need to cleanse my palate and start fresh. I can also say that I was clearly self-medicating when I purchased some of these songs and created the playlist. Listed are a select few to represent what the Chicago Vol. 3 playlist was like.

Stars Are Blind- Paris Hilton. You know, sometimes you just have to close your eyes and pretend the person you’re with is someone else. That’s what I do when I hear this song because as long as I forget who is singing, the song is good pop.

Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo- Bloodhound Gang. I love these guys, but I never expected to share this particular song with anyone in a car. It reminded me of hearing “Let’s Talk About Sex” in the car with my Granddad once, just not as awkard. More “unexpected”.

Suddenly I See- KT Tunstall- I heard this song when I watched The Devil Wears Prada. I don’t seek this song out, but it’s a good driving song.

Call Me When You’re Sober- Evanescence. J and I were both a little curious to see how all the internal drama of this band was going to translate into the material. If this song is representative of that, then it’s just another day in Evanescenceland. Take it or leave it.

Fidelity- Regina Spektor. I downloaded this song and then forgot about it until I saw the video. Pretty original. I can appreciate that she is doing her own thing.

Idlewild Blue- Outkast. I have always liked Outkast anyway, but this song is pretty amazing even though when the lyrics start I always want to continue singing Higher Ground.

Electricity- Anathema. I’m very new to these guys. It’s moody, ambient, and a nice background piece to any conversation. Like another band I like, as M would put it, “this music’s made for [luv makin]”. Yes, it is.

Murderers- John Frusciante. I’m not surprised that I added John to this playlist since we were on our way to an acoustic show and he’s just a fucking great composer. But I have no idea why I decided to add this song after a 30 second taste.

Sexyback- Justin Timberlake. Sometimes I need to sex things up a bit.

Baby Hold On- Dixie Chicks. I don’t give a shit what they say about politics- who cares! But, what surprised me for wanting to add them was the fact that I was SO SICK of them being played on Huntsville Radio all the time and would have been happy to never hear their music again. HOWEVER, this latest album is phenomenal. Also, J really likes this song and played it for me one night while we were having a “night”. It makes my heart melt.

Redemption. Here are some other tunes that made it onto the playlist. A little more K-typical…

Last Caress- Misfits
DOA- Foo Fighters
Dancing With Myself- Billy Idol
Paranoid- Black Sabbath
Exo-Politics- MUSE
Lonely Road- Daniel Lioneye
Goody Two Shoes- Adam Ant
Bad Reputation- Joan Jett
I Want to Be Buried in Your Backyard- Nightmare of You
Headfirst for Halos- My Chemical Romance

-K

25 Greatest Live Bands Now

It’s Monday at 8:00am and I am standing at a newsstand in the Memphis airport jonesing for some music magazines when I reach for the new SPIN. Johnny Knoxville is on the cover, but what catches my eye is the top headline: “The 25 Greatest Live Bands Now”. I must buy this. I’ll only comment on the bands on the list I’ve seen…

Number 21 – Against Me!
A good live performance, okay, they’re low on the list, so I’ll accept that.

Number 14 – Yeah Yeah Yeahs
I’m a little surprised by this. See our review of their St. Louis show for more background.

Number 13 – My Chemical Romance
Okay, I’m with you having seen them twice last year. They are solid performers and know their audience.

Number 11 – Queens of the Stone Age
Yeah, they put on a good show.

Number 9 - Prince
Only number nine? Is there a guitarist out there that makes playing look so effortless? Now, I’m starting to question you, SPIN.

Number 4 – Red Hot Chili Peppers
When you say “Greatest Live Bands Now”, I’m assuming you mean if I went to see them on their current tour. I could see the Chili Peppers being up there about fifteen years ago for the unexpected factor, but I don’t know if I agree about today. I would go to see John Frusciante, but I don’t think he alone can rank a number four. Maybe I’m just bitter that St. Louis is nowhere on their tour schedule this year!

Number 1 – U2
What?! Yeah they’re good, but Jim DeRogatis didn’t use the phrase “impassioned windbaggery” to describe some of Bono’s onstage commentary for nothin. They should be on the list but I question them being number one. Is this like figure skating where they give the gold to the “seasoned performer”?

But SPIN, as I sit at the gate waiting for my flight, if I didn’t think I would be branded a security risk, I probably would have screamed. What were you thinking with no Foo Fighters on the list? They’re so good live that most of the audience needs a cigarette afterwards. Even when I’m not feeling all the songs on their latest release, I can always depend on a stellar live show.

I’ll have to console myself at their concert in Chicago this Friday night, cigarettes in hand. --J

Music To Write Reports To

In a hotel room in southern California last week, I sat in front of my laptop and wrote reports for work while listening to this pretty varied playlist. Be warned. This playlist is all over the damn place (like me). -K

Love Train – Wolfmother
Wolfmother is a breakout band hailing from Australia. This song makes me feel crazy sexy. It’s a marriage of Sabbath riffs, Zeppelin-esque vocals (that I mistook for Jack White when I first heard this song on the radio) and funk. It’s my favorite song that I’ve downloaded this summer.

Bliss – Muse
I read in a 2005 Alternative Press magazine that Muse is the band that all your favorite bands are into. I saw Muse here in St. Louis. It was the first time I went to a concert on my own. Razorlight opened. At this show, I met two guys who were Muse superfans. One of them had traveled from Newfoundland to see them in St. Louis. I love meeting superfans and I loved this show.

Free - Donavon Frankenreiter
In 2004, this song was in heavy rotation on the radio in Melbourne, Australia. One Saturday, my British friend Moo and I took a hike up into the hills surrounding the city. We heard this song a million times on this day, but it didn't matter. This song is so full of good feeling that you can't get sick of it.

Pass It On - The Coral
These guys hail from Merseyside, England. Pass It On's plucky guitar, easy rhythm, and message of acceptance and moving on was a light during dark times for me back in the winter of 2003/2004. The claustrophobia I experienced at work and in Huntsville as a result of an awkward breakup with a coworker was cause for me to climb the walls. To escape the gossip at work I would sit in my cubicle and listen to streaming Virgin Radio. It was on this station that I first heard Pass It On. It is extremely easy on the ears the morning after if you are in the habit of finishing a bottle of red wine every night just to get to sleep. Dark days are gone, but this song remains a remedy.

I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do - ABBA
I love ABBA. When I hear this song, I have vague, but happy memories of red geraniums, German family members, and a sunny garden. Lovely.

Photograph – Def Leppard
I always think of the early days of MTV when I hear this song. It’s so full of hooks! Gotta love it.

Dancing With Myself – Billy Idol
Billy Idol music is ageless to me. This song makes me feel alive just like it did when it was in heavy rotation on MTV in the 80s. Every time I hear it, I want to dance like Molly Ringwald in The Breakfast Club. Oi, sexy!

Thunder Road – Bruce Springsteen
I love this man’s work so much. This may be my favorite song of Bruce’s besides “Racing in the Streets”. On a cold late November night, this song came on while I was driving down the NJ Turnpike heading to Woodbridge, NJ, and I sang every word. Loudly. Bruce has a way of telling stories through song that is unmatched in my opinion. Pianos, saxophones and melancholic story-telling make up all that I love about this artist.

Rocket Queen – Guns N’ Roses
I have always thought that the change in the middle of the song was amazing. When I read Chuck Klosterman’s opinion of this song in Fargo Rock City, I wondered how I could meet this man. I’m here in St. Louis, Chuck. I’m here.

If You Want My Love – Cheap Trick
Cheap Trick is one of those bands that I have fallen in and out of throughout my life. The light in this song has, for me, never gone out.

Snow (Hey Oh) – RHCP
What’s a trip to California without some RHCP? I’m currently celebrating their new release. On a related topic, RHCP’s cd BloodSugarSexMagik was the very first cd I ever owned.

Under Pressure – The Used/MCR
I’m a lifelong Queen and David Bowie fan. I was a little nervous when MCR covered this song as it is a little ambitious. I am really impressed with this cover. For a time all proceeds went to the Tsunami Relief fund when purchased on iTunes. This cover nails it.

Original of the Species - U2
I do my love of U2 no justice with this tiny blurb. I have been a supporter of U2 since the early 80s (I, unlike many hardcore fans, feel that POP was not a disappointment, but a successful and admirable departure). Someday I’ll write about what this music means to me in a proper post, but for now just know that this song is U2 doing it to me again…

Time to Burn – The Rasmus
This band hails from Finland. I wouldn’t have known about them had I not been scouring YouTube for vintage HIM videos months ago. The vocals are a bit strained at times and the poppy production is not always my cup of tea. Their album may at times even sound like a more sinister Backstreet Boys production, but I’m not ready to write them off yet. Their music has a powerful and melancholic sound that makes me think they are almost there…

Don’t You Ever Leave Me Baby – Hanoi Rocks
Before there was Nightwish, HIM, or The Rasmus there was Hanoi Rocks. I hear an influence of the New York Dolls in this song. I first heard of Hanoi Rocks back in 1984 when drummer Razzle’s death in “the” car accident with Vince Neil was reported on the news. This song is not epic or cathartic, but it represents what I like to hear when I just want to get out of my head a little bit and sing along.

MakeDamnSure - Taking Back Sunday
This is an emo band and an emo song (see Emo Memo below), but I love this song.

There Is a Light That Never Goes Out – The Smiths
I have always enjoyed the Englishness of The Smiths. I really think that one could write a paper on their lyrical irony and how this music somehow reflects English society and one’s reaction to living in it. Yeah, no.

In The Beginning There Was Oasis at UIC Pavilion, June 20, 2005 - Chicago, IL

I intended to write a review for Chuck Klosterman's Killing Yourself to Live, which I finished two nights ago. I can’t just yet. Why? It’s because I heard "Helena" on the radio on the way home. I decided I needed to tell the story of two young women who went on their first concert road trip together and realized that there was something special happening. It’s been a year since that memorable concert road trip and you, reader, should know how this shit began.

J and I are two women whose paths have crossed a couple of times in the past. Once was at the University of Alabama in Huntsville in the late nineties, where we both took an upper-level literature class. Then after parting ways for a year or so, I waited on her and her husband at a restaurant where we gave each other cliff notes of what we were doing. Soon after, I interviewed for her and she hired me. We both ended up moving to the St. Louis office and took a few long walks after work. Most of our conversations were free therapy: we would unleash all of our angst about life, work, and the transition from Huntsville to St. Louis. I did most of the talking, as usual. For me, my life was work and my cat, so it was great to have a friend in whom I could confide. It had been a tumultuous couple of years and so having her to talk to was a life saver.

OK- so during this time, we discovered our shared love of music. J suggested we head to Chicago and see Oasis, with Jet opening up for them. In 2004, I had spent three months traveling and working out of our Melbourne office and so I had heard a lot of Jet. I immediately signed on. Plus, Oasis’ music was a fixture on the music scene when I was college. I loved them.

We drove up to Chicago and met up with Aunt B. and Mel, both childhood friends of J. It was the first time meeting Mel and Aunt B. I had met Aunt B once before, but I was really loaded at the time and for various reasons don’t really want to consider that the first time I met her. She knows why.

Anyway, so we headed to the venue and sat down. The auditorium contained a microcosm of college youth and people like us. Nothing special, really.

Jet played all the hits that I knew and we enjoyed them during their relatively short set.

Afterwards, the roadies came on to build Oasis' set. I was sitting on the aisle and got prepared to hear some great tunes that would take me down memory lane. We were hot. It was a little humid in the UIC Pavilion.

Two petite guys came walking down the stairs past me dressed all in black. J leaned over and said “look, Good Charlotte just walked in”. As soon as I looked down at them, they had stopped in the aisle about six rows down, I went cold. I noticed Mikey Way first. He has hair and glasses that you can’t mistake for anyone but Mikey Way. Next to him was a goth kid who had a mop of black hair under a black and white trucker hat. I grabbed J’s knee and said “that’s My Chemical Romance”. J looked at me and laughed as though I had just cracked a joke. I wasn’t joking. She looked at me and asked, “how the hell did you recognize them from behind?”. I may not always remember how to set up reports at work for my customers, but I sure as shit remember details of my bands. Let’s not analyze how I know them from behind. That’s best left unsaid.

Now, I had been a growing fan of theirs and had tickets to see them at Warped in St. Louis the next day. A few weeks before purchasing my ticket to see MCR at Warped in St.L, I had brought to work the May 2005 Spin magazine with them on the cover. I stepped into J’s office and threw the magazine down on her desk telling her we need to watch out for this band. (Ok, that sounds really dramatic, but I remember it like that.) I had already become obsessed with the band's music and videos. I especially had an affinity for the oddball lead singer, Gerard Way. That goth kid standing next to Mikey was Gerard Way. I almost shit myself.

They started coming up the stairs and were now one row down from me, taking the seats in the aisle across from me. “GERARD!”, I said and he looked at me. I stood up and shook his hand and introduced myself. I think I said something like “I’m going to see you at Warped in STL tomorrow. Good luck- blah blah blah”. I don’t know what I said, really. He grinned the whole time and was very gracious. I suddenly felt very awkward and something odd happened. I didn’t want to out them any more than I had. Of course, they weren’t that BIG yet, but to me they were. I ended whatever rambling I did quickly and sat down. Aunt B and Mel thought he was some old friend, but J quietly explained that Gerard was my Dave Grohl. With that, they understood immediately what was happening. I was meeting my number one guy. J told me I should have asked the guys for a ride to St. Louis. She even offered to rough me up a bit so that I looked desperate for help. Pathetically, I actually considered it for a couple of seconds.

I don’t even remember Oasis for most of the show. I just remember that since Gerard and Mikey were in between us and the stage I spent the duration of their presence watching Gerard’s every move.

Somehow, Gerard’s bad posture and incessant nail-biting didn’t turn me off. Every now and then I would look at J in disbelief. Her reenactment of his nail-biting still cracks me up.

At some point, Gerard went up to the concession stand and J followed. When she came back I grilled her for details. She observed how uncomfortable he seemed in his own skin and how he and she almost knocked into each other by accident. She thought he was very unassuming. I think that after observing someone from a safe distance you can get a feeling for bullshit. Gerard isn’t a bullshitter. When he says he was the oddball kid who spent a lot of time in his head, it was painfully obvious that this was true. We got it.

They didn’t stay for the whole set. They left right before Oasis performed “Don’t Look Back In Anger”. J and I were both relieved because now we could both focus on the show. Having had a most serendipitous encounter with Gerard Way, I sat on the back of my chair and put my arm around J while we sang that song back to the band along with the audience. It was one of those moments that you can’t explain. To say that I felt connected to J is true, to say that I felt connected to the universe is true, to say that someone was giving me something to be happy about for the first time in a hellish couple of years is extremely true.

We decided to drive back to St. Louis that night. We drank Red Bulls and talked music and life the whole way back. We came up on several band buses that we figured were carrying the bands to St. Louis for Warped. One of those was MCR’s bus, I knew it. We drove alongside them for a lot of the road trip.

We listened to a lot of David Bowie, which seemed perfect for a nocturnal drive. It wasn’t all cathartic and emotional. We listened to some Misfits, Foo Fighters, and Queen. At some point the sun was rising to J’s left. I looked toward her and said “Oh my God, J, look”. She grinned a crazy grin and said “YOU’RE GONNA HAVE TO TELL ME WHAT, ‘COS I AM NOT LOOKING AT WHATEVER HORRIBLE THIING IS OUT THERE!”. It was just the rising sun! HAHAHA Two Red Bulls each and we were already paranoid and strung-out coke heads. I love it.

When we got back home J went to work and I got ready to see MCR for the first time at Warped. As that morning became day, we had completed our first concert road trip together. It was the beginning of a blog waiting to happen.

-K

High Eyes

Not to put too much pressure on him, but M is the reason I will never completely stop drinking. It is too goddemm fun.

The only thing missing Saturday night was my better half- J, who has been out of town on business for FREAKING EVER. To digress slightly, J has an executive office that is HUGE and a perfect playground for M and me to take unprofessional pictures with my camera phone and immediately text her the images. The intent for these pictures is to (1) teach her to never leave us again and (2) to make her know that we miss her terribly. We “punish” because we “love”. This is probably why J is a mom and we are not. To further demonstrate this, we often yell at Feefers for walking into the room in that “cat” way of his. It’s infuriating. (we're usually laughing when we do it, because he's a beautiful and lovely baby.) Anyway, the last series of photos we sent was to celebrate June 6, 2006. M and I both wore black and took turns prostrating ourselves on her floor in crucifixion poses while wearing a homemade mask her daughter had made. It was HILARIOUS. To us.

In retrospect, J would probably have been glad to have missed it. I had just received my second HIM dvd that had a couple of “making of the ________ video” special features. I love the making of’s with Bam Margera because during the shoot something always seems to go wrong, i.e., a keyboard has not turned up and then there are hours to kill. It’s these moments I love because it usually entails Bam and Ville showcasing what hilarious drinking buddies they are. That night I had brought two HIM dvds, one that the band officially released (the mother lode) and the one that Bam Margera released. The latter was what I had gotten in the mail that Saturday morning.

After our first bottle of wine M threw the first pack o’Marlboros across the living room, signaling it was time to open the second. We noticed an ominous storm approaching. The windows were open, of course, and so there was a breeze coming into the loft that set the mood for the night ahead. It lasted for much of the evening.

We finished the making of’s and were locked in. It started with M’s request to watch the featured videos after each making of, and then went downhill from there. By the time we crashed, we had studied Wille Walo for four hours straight. After the videos came the live performances, then the special feature live performances, then the laptop came out and youtube happened so that we could see other versions of the videos that will never be seen on American tv. It was a multimedia event in the highest degree. I think with every question M might have had I could answer with a click of a button. It was incredible. There is a special feature where HIM performs 'The Sacrament' to a HUGE audience in Russia. As we watch Ville play with his nose and forget his own lyrics, M comments “yup, those are ‘high eyes’”. That’s not funny to anyone, but us. This comment was said with such deadpan conviction that we both looked at each other and exploded in laughter. I would love to immortalize these quotes in a book, but honestly you have to hear him say it. It’s M’s delivery of these very unspecial quotes that is so memorable. “High Eyes” is one, and J has one: “Gorgeous”.

What I remember, with a bit of humility, is pointing out how in charge Ville is on stage, how effing romantic and perfect “In Joy and Sorrow” is as a song and how the live performance is at the Rock Am Ring festival in Germany and how you can see Nurburg’s (not Nurnberg, where I lived) castle in the background “uch, look at that. IT’S SO PERFECT!”, my explanation for the song “The Beginning of the End” and how it was about an ex-girlfriend who was hospitalized for anorexia, immediately followed by me asking “did I just yell that?”, and replaying the live performance of “This Fortress of Tears” for M a few times.

Ok, so we really watched a lot of HIM that night. But, we also studied Suede and tried desperately to get through MCR’s Life on the Murder Scene (which we had already studied with wine on a previous night). It was unfortunate because by the time we put that on I was already starting to fade. Once The Fade engulfs me, the end is near. But I was still rendered speechless at the opening of Helena. That song will never fail to kill me just a little bit.

At M’s request, I created a perfect HIM playlist to be played at our respective funerals. Here it is:

The Beginning of the End
When Love and Death Embrace
Death is in Love with Us
This Fortress of Tears
In Joy and Sorrow
The Sacrament
Play Dead
The Funeral of Hearts
Join Me in Death
Resurrection
The Path

-K

HIM is Love, Heartache, and Redemption in St. Louis

On May 20, 2006, J and I made our way to the Pageant, a medium-sized venue in University City. It's large enough for popular bands to play while still maintaining a certain sense of intimacy with the audience. Saturday night, HIM headlined with support act, Aiden.

At the Pageant, if you're 21 you can gain access to the attached Halo Bar. This is a bar that allows you to get your pre-show drink on then gain early access. This is what we did. By 5:30 we had made our way down to the Pageant and hurried past the Hot Topic contingent that had been waiting in line all day. We sat down, ordered ourselves a drink and mentally prepared for the night ahead. For sure, it was going to be slightly different from other concert nights as one week prior I had won two tickets to a meet and greet after the show.

Back at the Halo Bar, J people-watched and I, next to her, was somewhere else entirely in my head. As I drank my second whiskey sour and smoked my umpteenth cigarette, I organized and finalized my questions. I was going to ask Linde about the Daniel Lioneye project and beg that they come to St. Louis if they take it on the road. I would ask Ville about the significance of the Finnish folk song "Paratiisi", which he sang with the Agents a lifetime of his ago. I would say "I've read that you superstitiously start your shows 8 minutes after the hour, could you expand on that?" Of course, when it came down to it, whether or not I could form any coherent sentences at all would have to be seen.

We had grand plans to be in the pit that night, as I had a strange desire to see Ville's pores. Briefly, while in the pit J and I met a superfan named Dan who was a very open and friendly chap. He and I chatted about our favorite HIM songs for a bit. Ultimately, as the crowd got much larger around us, we decided to ditch the pit and said goodbye to Dan. It was a good move to settle in our seats up in the balcony. While there is no crowd surfing at this venue, the opening act Aiden, My Chemical Romance wannabes (do not get me started), encouraged moshing and general rowdiness. In fact, one of the guitarists actually stage dived (dove?) into the crowd directly left of center, which is where we had originally stood. We sat cynically and impatiently through Aiden's set and waited for the music that can make my heart drip with innocent love and then in an instant throw me into the quagmire of deviant desires. I came tonight to hear what love and lust sound like live.

When Aiden finally ended their set, the stage crew prepared the stage for the night's headliners, complete with candlabras (how goth). What sounded like Scandinavian ambient music filled the smoky air. It was going to be a night unlike any other concert night.

The music ended and the lights went down at exactly 9:08 PM. As soon as the iconic heartagram lit up in the background, the collective sonic screams could have reached heaven itself. As Ville Valo slinked to the microphone with trademark cigarette in hand, it was not just any lead singer we were observing- this was someone who would, for the next hour and a half, command the swooning audience with the slightest nod of his head. He was suave, laid-back, and often courteous to the audience, bowing and clapping with approval as we sang the songs back to him at his invitation. Excluding the occasional oral introduction to this song or that song and the periodic sight of bras being tossed onto the stage, this paragraph could sum up the entire performance. But it won't.

Setlist (not necessarily in this order)

Soul On Fire
Vampire Heart
The Funeral of Hearts
It's All Tears
The Sacrament (encore)
Play Dead
Killing Loneliness
Wings of a Butterfly
Join Me In Death
Behind the Crimson Door
Wicked Game
Right Here In My Arms
Razorblade Kiss
Your Sweet 666

Each song was a highlight. At no time was there a lull in the performance and the audience sang every memorized word of every anthemic song. And I do mean every song. The heavy "Soul On Fire" (Love Metal) opened the show. With lyrics like: "We are like the living dead/ Craving for deliverence/With a frozen heart and a soul on fire", it is no wonder that much of the audience there was dressed in gothic regalia. The next song was "Vampire Heart" (Dark Light). This one is quite possibly my favorite of all HIM songs. "Right Here In My Arms" (RR), a fantastic rock-out tune, brought everyone to a clapping frenzy. With "Join Me In Death" (RR) and "The Funeral of Hearts", Ville demonstrated his falsetto with the grace and passionate plea of his miserably romantic poet persona. "It's All Tears" (Greatest Lovesongs, Vol. 666) was HIM again exercising its metal roots. Ville's jump from baritone to tenor was well exercised in "Behind The Crimson Door" (DL), but was never more excellently displayed then with "It's All Tears'" simple but effective chorus "I'm waiting for you to drown in my love/ So open your arms". Because this is America, because the latest album Dark Light is the first HIM album to be released here and overseas simultaneously, and because HIM now has these videos playing on MTV2, songs like "Killing Loneliness" and "Wings of A Butterfly" were the most loudly sung by the audience, but didn't stand out as much as the others. HIM's cover of "Wicked Game" (GL666), both live and recorded, makes one ask "Chris who?". Finally, the encore was, appropriately, "The Sacrament" (LM). The song is like a beautiful unholy hymn. It was a perfect, albeit abrupt conclusion to the pseudo-religious experience shared by hundreds.

Because I studied every movement, I thought I would mention that Ville constantly (1) spit on the stage (2) shrugged and rolled his shoulders back as if to relieve tension. We all know how thin he is, but it's something different to behold live. He also wore black slacks, a black blazer, and a Black Sabbath t-shirt. Oh, and the black beanie, god bless him. He was incredibly "covered". He's not a very energetic soul on stage, but he did seem much more stationary than usual. If I heard him correctly, although any speaking he did was so low and warbled I couldn't make out much, he did mention the word "sick". Damn. I knew where this was going.

What was missing was anything from Deep Shadows and Brilliant Highlights. For me, I consider "Lose You Tonight", "Heartache Every Moment", "In Joy and Sorrow" and "Pretending" to be outstanding HIM songs. Any one of those songs could have fit into the setlist. I would have loved to hear "Sweet Pandemonium" and "This Fortress of Tears" from Love Metal. And of course, "Sigillum Diaboli", a fantastic rock song from Razorblade Romance, was missed. Selfishly, I would have loved to hear Ville perform a non-accompanied version of "Paratiisi", but maybe he'll grant me a private concert someday.

To our disappointment, the Warner Bros representative announced that because the band was very tired and very sick, that there would be no meet and greet after the show.

While the radio station rep and the WB rep struggled to find an alternative to this disappointment, I sat down and lit up a cigarette and absorbed the moment. While watching the crew tear down HIM's set, I came to the conclusion that this was one of those life lessons where you are forced to accept certain truths. What I had been looking foward to was not going to happen, but god damnit if I didn't enjoy the concert more than anything in a long while. Regardless, it was disappointing, but I didn't feel personally slighted. What would have been worse is the band being forced to see people when they clearly weren't in the shape to do so. That is always a tricky situation- that's where you find yourself in an awkward moment subject to the artists' moods. No thank you.

We ended up with two signed Dark Light promos and exclusive t-shirts.

So as I write this, I still struggle a little bit with my feelings, but despite the disappointment, I am listening to my HIM concert playlist, enjoying a cold sweet tea, and smoking my tasty Marlboro Lights (while wearing my Jagermeister HIM t-shirt, I might add). I come out of this having enjoyed the concert immensely. I also feel somewhat thankful for the rotten post-show experience. Why? Because with the money that J and I will make from auctioning J's signed Dark Light poster, HIM will have unknowingly purchased our next concert tickets (though mine is framed and proudly displayed on my wall, thank you very much). Kiitos, boys! -K