She Won't Let You Fly, But She Might Let You Sing

Until tonight I have avoided watching The Wall in a sober state. I now know why. The idea of escaping into a fantasy world to cope with reality and creating an emotional wall around you hits a little too close to home. Seeing it with a clear head tonight during an emotional time (I'm moving, J is moving) may not have been the best idea. It ruined me as a 13-year old hopped up on vodka and pain killers at her friend's house. I never wanted to see Bob Geldof take a razor to his body ever again. I also didn't want to see an angry sphincter judge getting ready to shit something abstract and grotesque on the protagonist. But anyway, tonight I found myself curled up with my cat experiencing the whole thing from beginning to end.
I have heard Roger Waters explain that concept behind The Wall was inspired by the excessive success the band saw after touring in support of Dark Side of the Moon. It was also autobiographical of his life. David Gilmour has criticized it as being a catalog of the people that Waters considers to have screwed up his life. Well, not everyone has a therapist or anti-depressants; some just write one of the most successful concept albums ever and subsequently a cult movie favorite. It may not be my favorite Floyd album as a whole, but Hey You and Comfortably Numb are never far from being stuck in my head. Frankly, Mother speaks to me like no song ever has, will or can.
I can see why the movie The Wall has enjoyed such cult success: you see a creative rock star grow increasingly isolated through success, eventually envisioning himself as a fascist dictator, and finally judging himself. It's out there, but it's a vision of a haunted rock star's hubris and ultimate self-destruction, fantasy and reality coming together via live action and creative animation. I can't believe it took me this long to understand. As a Floyd fan, it's about time I do. -K